Sounds like your children are very lucky. My feelings about the gender issue really bother me as well. I think you just have to let kids be who they want to be, rather than fitting them into a mould that is expected. I think in any situation freedom of thought leads to greater creativity anyway.

Your son’s comment made me laugh.

Have a great day.

It’s not that I’m concerned about the future of creative planning in advertising. God no! I simply want “what’s best for my kids”; to let them explore whatever they’re curious about and let them make the most of their creative potential, whatever it is. I think that’s what will make them the happiest in life.

I have two daughters and a son. My son who is 1½ spends a lot of his time playing with his sisters. And as you can imagine, they’re not exactly playing testosterone intensive games of brute masculinity. The best way to sum it up for you is through the words ‘pink & purple’. So my wife and I have also been faced with the gender role issues that you touch on when you mention that 10 year old boy and his desire to have a fairy costume. I hope I would let my son buy that fairy costume at that age. I really think I would actually, but I couldn’t tell you for certain, which bothers me slightly actually.

The other day my wife and I were offered a little sample of what’s to come. “PANTIES ARE NICE” said my son emphatically with a big grin on his face. At least at 1½, that’s hysterically funny.

I have two nephews who were born one day apart, one belongs to my half sister and the other to my sister in law. Both go to school in Australia, one goes to a Steiner School, the other to a Systemic Catholic School. They are 7 (I think – what a horrible Aunt I am).

My nephew who goes to a Steiner School, still couldn’t read or write the last time I saw him – 1 year ago. He is highly creative though and asks why a lot which is great. My nephew who goes to a Systemic Catholic School, could read and write and was good at maths, loves making models etc. I don’t know a lot about Steiner Schools, but from what I have heard, they don’t push children to learn until they are ready – my Steiner School nephew was being encouraged to be held back from the more structured learning environment they have for another year. Their philosophy is:

“We shouldn’t ask: ‘What does a person need to know or be able to do in order to fit into the existing social order?’
Instead we should ask: ‘What lives in each human being and what can be developed in him or her?’
Only then will it be possible to direct the new qualities of each emerging generation into society. Society will then become, what young people, as whole human beings, make out of the existing social conditions. The new generation should not just be made to be what present society wants it to become”. – Rudolf Steiner

I think this is probably a very intelligent way of raising generations, but, understand your comment: “I’m raising my kids in an intensely competitive environment; a system predicated on the idea of academic ability. So in order to equip my kids to be able to compete in this environment, I may be “forced” to compromise on what my intuition tells me is right.”

I think if I had children, I would want to equip them to deal with the society I know, whilst trying to foster their creativity. I dropped out of Uni with 2 subjects left to finish cause I was already working full time and moved to another state for a job. I later went back and finished the degree and found that more job opportunities were opened to me, that were closed before. Working off-shore, or for a govt department in Aus both would have been a lot more difficult. As a parent, I guess you want what is best for your child… what is best is very subjective though.

This also reminds me of a while back when I used to make and sell a range of childrens clothing and accessories including fairy costumes. I remember a 10 year old boy who wanted a fairy costume, his mother debated with him, and then brought it for him, he put it on and left. A strong part of me thinks that I too would have let my son have the costume – who am I to put gender restrictions as to what is right and what is wrong. Another part of me struggels with this, I know how tough the world can be, and I would want to make my child’s life as easy as possible.